Pregnancy is an odd state of affairs. One has many conflicting emotions. It makes me feel both weak and strong. I feel like nurturing and being nurtured. I feel vulnerable. I feel important. Since I'm not just living for me, I'm careful of the food I put in my mouth, the gas fumes I breathe when filling the tank, and the cold remedies I take when I'm sick. I try to be my normal, active self, but find that I can't bend over and pick things up very well or squeeze through tight places. People tell me that I'm not very big for seven months, but it's a reality check when you park next to a grocery cart holder, then find that you can't get past the railing.
It took me a while to come to grips with this state, especially since it had been so long, I never expected to do this again, and, in the beginning, the survival of the pregnancy was in serious doubt. I've almost got my brain wrapped around it now. But I am treasuring this time. Unlike most women who are pregnant in their 20's and 30's, I know I'll never be pregnant again in this mortal life (who knows how things are done in the next one). So for me, pregnancy is fun, scary, and sweet.
